long time no speak

Hello Readers

Long time no hear, sorry I haven't been online recently but I have been trying to deal with mental health issues and also my health has deteriorated.

Gary is around me more and it is more prominent with his visits.

During the day I am living in the now which is sort of a living walking nightmare but I am continuing this journey.

I have my actual exit date and I know how I will go home

My brother is now up here since moving from the dreaded homeless hostel he was in.

A new job for him and a fresh start.

Since he has been up here he has become more spiritual himself and he smells spirit and feels them.

My dad has been visiting so has our two grandfathers one smoked old hoborn tobacco and the other smoked a cherry tobacco using his pipe.

Since the last time I was on here I have received a number of spiritual gifts and signs.

One is seeing Gary in different forms

E.g his face appears in my bathroom mat or in the mirror, the fir trees in a neighbour's garden he appears smiling at me.

He plays our song in my head lol well actually sing it to me after I have tried to sleep.

The song is Die with a smile by Bruno Mars and Lady GAGA.

Each time I hear it on the radio I cry.

Also Gary has been meddling in my love life and he has introduced me to a man who I will not mention.

He is truly a beautiful looking man but younger than me.

We have fallen for each other deeply and now I know why he doesn't want me to me alone.

Since we last spoke I have come to accept that my time on this planet is short and recently I have been dealing with mini brain aneurysms and black outs which has at the present fractured my skull and eye sockets pierced my left eye with a piece of glass as I have collapsed.

Sometimes I ask myself why am I here, then I realised I am here to learn.

It has been a not normal year.

It has been a year of trials and accidents.

Last night was weird I went icy cold and felt myself leaving my body but it was entirely different feeling, it felt like I was going home but I felt something stopped me.

I think Gary will be waiting for me and I am sure there will be a party of some description.

All I was told as I have said to Gary time after time that he wishing he could help but he said he would talk to someone about taking me home early.

Well not long to go before the time comes and I cannot wait.

Bring it on please.

This will be probably my last blog I do as being on social media has made me mentally disturbed in many ways indeed.

I will show you a few images of what has happened to me through self harming and being stuck here.

So I shall bid you farewell and thank you for believing in me.

Truly amazing and yes true love lives on it never dies.