Nightmare PTSD dream continues 10/1/2022

My night has been horrible watching as if it's a movie and cannot do Jack shit about it.

Gary suffered with PTSD being an army man and on the front line you have to fight for your country.

Yeah do what your Commander says from instructions by the Prime minister in power at that time.

If I could go back I would but I can't all I can do is sit and watch in horror while he is being shot through the back of the head.

I can see from a far blood splattered everywhere all over the floor and him.

This time I did wake to being sick and cry. I semi chocked on my sick.

I am connected to Gary so much that trying to move forward is causing doubts and questions about whether or not I am cheating again.

He says I won't be but I think I am.

I eventually got up this morning feeling sad and sick still.

Went into bathroom had a shower cleaned teeth and felt someone hug my wet naked body and a loud I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

What more can I ask for apart from him being physical.

I know to people who do not believe this can happen but it has now happened many time.

He actually physically made love to me on the bedroom floor.

Quiet quick and gentle everything like it was before when he was alive human solid.

And yes I think Mr Blair needs a rope with a noose for what he did sent 1000s of soldiers to their deaths unnecessaryly because of a dumb American who was trigger happy. In saying that it bring trauma to me and the return of that horrible nightmare watching someone's brains being blown out. PTSD symptoms are back making me cry and sick. I just want to curl up and leave my body and cut the cord but Gary refuses to do that he just guard and protects me.

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continuing relationship with my deceased husband Gary

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